Ask A Therapist: How Can I Let Go of Control and Embrace Uncertainty?
Embracing Flexibility and Finding Peace in the Unknown
Published on
Feb 2, 2025
Acknowledge the Need for Control
The first step is recognizing why you feel the need to control. Is it because you fear the unknown or have past experiences where lack of control led to discomfort or failure? By understanding the root cause, you can begin to dismantle the need for control and make peace with uncertainty.
Uncertainty isn’t inherently negative—it’s an inevitable part of life. Instead of seeing it as something threatening, try to view it as an opportunity for growth, creativity, and new experiences. When faced with uncertainty, remind yourself, "I don’t need to have all the answers right now."
Focus on What You Can Control
While letting go of control over certain things is necessary, there are still aspects of life you can control, such as your reactions, your mindset, and your actions. Focus on empowering yourself in these areas. Let go of controlling outcomes and instead focus on how you respond to situations.
Practice Mindfulness and Acceptance
Mindfulness helps you stay grounded in the present moment and reduces the need to control future events. By practicing mindfulness, you learn to observe your thoughts and feelings without judgment, letting you let go of the need for certainty. Techniques such as deep breathing, meditation, or body scanning can help you stay present and reduce anxiety about the future.
Image courtesy via Lummi
Uncertainty can trigger discomfort, and it’s natural to want to avoid it. However, developing a tolerance for discomfort can help you realize that you can handle it. Start by intentionally placing yourself in situations with a degree of uncertainty, and remind yourself that it’s okay to feel uneasy. Over time, you’ll become more resilient and less fearful of the unknown.
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