Ask A Therapist: How Do I Cope With Perfectionism and Develop Acceptance?
How to overcome perfectionistic tendencies, quiet the inner critic, and find acceptance in who you are.
Published on
Jan 17, 2022
Understand the Root of Perfectionism
Perfectionism often stems from deep-seated fears, such as fear of failure, fear of judgment, or even fear of not being enough. Reflecting on where your perfectionism began can be a helpful first step. Was it influenced by family, societal standards, or personal experiences?
Perfectionism thrives on setting impossibly high expectations. Start by identifying these standards and questioning their realism. Are they achievable, or are they setting you up for frustration? Ask yourself, “What would it look like if I allowed myself to do this imperfectly?”
Practice Self-Compassion
Perfectionism often involves a harsh inner critic. Developing self-compassion is essential. Instead of being critical when you make a mistake, treat yourself with the same kindness and understanding you’d offer a friend. Acknowledge your flaws and imperfections as part of your humanity.
Focus on Progress, Not Perfection
Shift your mindset to prioritize growth and improvement over flawless results. Celebrate small wins and progress rather than obsessing over the end product. Embrace the idea that "done" is often better than "perfect."
Image courtesy via Lummi
Break down larger tasks into smaller, manageable steps. Setting clear, realistic goals helps reduce the pressure to achieve perfection and allows you to appreciate the progress along the way.
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